Just a short note to say HI and hope ya'll are enjoying the newsletters. I have laughed, cried and learned so much in these newsletters. We do have the greatest people around! To let you know, I have tried making a web page by following Slippy's instructions. He has done a fantastic job. If you would like to see, please go to http://www.angelfire.com/tx2/msboots/index.html. (2023: Site no longer posted)

If you are good at explaining so that others can learn, please do not hesitate to write and let us know.

Anything can be accomplished!

REMEMBER, Wizzer's quiz. Have you gotten all the answers yet? Mail your answers to Wizzer at quiz@dogstars.globalnet.co.uk . Good Luck!

Ms.Boots

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Thanks for keeping us informed Mig..need all the help we can get (or at least I do!)

For those with the time and have got IE5.0, here are some add ones.They are considered power tools, had used them when IE4 came out and loved them.There are many new features, that let you highlight text zoom images and read the source of the page.This generally only requires a right click in your browser, do to these things.There is wallpaper to be had for you toolbar, rather than the gray stuff by default.An option to zoom image on a page and also a save image too...I have to tell you that are way too cool and must have for the power surfer. They can be found at http://www.microsoft.com/Windows/IE/WebAccess/default.asp (2023: Microsoft has closed this portion of their site since they no longer support IE5)
The files are small and very effective... Take the plunge, you will love it : )Mig 8-)

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Fran .... AKA ...... Meta

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Here's a great link for you all!

hello. I'm DAKE from JAPAN.
thank you very much, Your home page use my characters.
now, I am making my characters homepage.
I will make Link for your homepage.

https://www.mermeliz.com/dake/index.htm

BYE!!

We thank you Dake for your contributions they are great ;-)

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Thanks Meta, so cute!

We practice TLC: We Tolerate your Trivia,
Laugh at your Lunacy, and Care when you Cry

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Thanks Chelsea!

"My name is I AM"
I was regretting the past
and fearing the future.
Suddenly my Lord was speaking:
"MY NAME IS I AM"
He paused.
I Waited. He continued.
"When you live in the past
with its mistakes and regrets,
it is hard. I am not there.
My name is not I WAS.
When you live in the future,
with its problems and fears,
it is hard. I am not there.
MY name is not I WILL BE.
When you live in this moment
it is not hard. I am here.
"MY name is I AM"


Helen Mallicoat

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Love this one Meta!

What is a Cat?

1. Cats do what they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They're totally unpredictable.
4. They whine when they are not happy.
5. When you want to play, they want to be alone.
6. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7. They expect you to cater to their every whim.
8. They're moody.
9. They leave hair everywhere.
10. They drive you nuts and cost an arm and a leg.

Conclusion: They're tiny women in little fur coats.

What is a Dog?

1. Dogs lie around all day, sprawled on the most comfortable piece of furniture in the house.
2. They can hear a package of food opening half a block away, but don't hear you when you're in the same room.
3. They can look dumb and lovable all at the same time.
4. They growl when they are not happy.
5. When you want to play, they want to play.
6. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7. They are great at begging.
8. They will love you forever if you rub their tummies.
9. They leave their toys everywhere.
10. They do disgusting things with their mouths and then try to give you a kiss.

Conclusion: They're tiny men in little fur coats.

I have returned home from a week's vacation and it is time to catch up with some humor for my friends:

Cuddlybear

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And It Was So

God created the mule, and told him: "You will be a Mule, working constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy loads on your back. You will eat grass and you will lack intelligence. You will live for 50 years." The mule answered: " To live like this for 50 years is too much. Please, give me no more than 30." And it was so.

Then God created the dog, and told him: "You will hold vigilance over the dwellings of Man, to whom you will be his greatest companion. You will eat his table scraps and live for 25 years." And the dog responded: "Lord, to live 25 years as a dog is too much. Please, no more than 10 years." And it was so.

God then created the monkey, and told him: "You are a Monkey. You will swing from tree to tree, acting like an idiot. You will be funny, and you shall live for 20 years." And the monkey responded: "Lord, to live 20 years as the clown of the world is too much. Please, Lord, give me no more than 10 years." And it was so.

Finally, God created Man and told him: "You are Man, the only rational being that walks the earth. You will use your intelligence to have mastery over the creatures of the world. You will dominate the earth and live for 20 years." And the man responded: "Lord, to be Man for only 20 years is too little. Please, Lord, give me the 20 years the mule refused, the 15 years the dog refused, and the ten years the monkey rejected." And it was so.

And so God made Man to live 20 years as a man, then marry and live 20 years like a mule working and carrying heavy loads on his back. Then, he is to have children and live 15 years as a dog, guarding his house and eating the leftovers after they empty the pantry; then, in his old age, to live 10 years as a monkey, acting like a fool to amuse his grandchildren. And it was so.
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A Blonde, A Brunette and A Red-Head...

There were women waiting to be executed. A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde. It was an old-fashioned execution. But, of course, these women didn't want to die, so they needed a plan. The red-head said, "I have an idea... follow my lead."

So, when it was time for the red-head's execution, the man put on her blindfold and made her line up against a wall. "Do you have any last words?" he asked. "No." she replied.

"Ok then... we're set. Ready.... aim...."

"TORNADO!" the she yelled out, pointing. The gunmen all turned around, and she escaped!

The brunette and blonde saw this. So, when it was time for the brunette's execution, the man put on a her blindfold and made her line up against a wall. "Do you have any last words?" he asked. "No." she replied.

"Ok then... we're set. Ready.... aim...."

"FLOOD!" the brunette yelled out, pointing. The gunmen all turned around, and she escaped, too!

Now the blonde understood this. So, when it was time for the blonde's execution, the man put on a her blindfold and made her line up against a wall. "Do you have any last words?" he asked. "No." she replied.

"Ok then... we're set. Ready.... aim...."

"FIRE!"

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The Genie
---------

A secretary, a paralegal and a partner in a city law firm are walking through a park on their way to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I
usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one."

"Me first! Me first!" says the secretary. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone.

In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the paralegal, "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone.

"You're next," the Genie says to the partner. The partner says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

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The Expectant Mother

A lady about seven months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing. She complained to the driver
and had the man arrested.

The case came up in court. The judge asked the man what he had to say for himself. The main replied, "Well your Honor, it was like this. When the lady got on the bus, I couldn't help but notice her condition. She sat under a sign that said, "The Gold Dust Twins are coming" and I had to smile. Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, "Sloan's Liniment will reduce the swelling" and I had to grin. Then she placed herself under a sign that said, "William's Big Stick Did the Trick" and I could hardly control myself. BUT....when she moved the
fourth time and sat under a sign that said, "Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this accident." I laughed out loud.

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